As I wrote last week, the birthday party my allergic daughter was invited to was coming up fast.  Given that it was an outdoor party with young teens/tweens, we had to do a quick education process about feeling unwell outside, buddying with a friend, not going to the bathroom or to find an adult alone if not feeling well and to self administer the epi-pen as necessary.

So who was more nervous when we went to the party?  You guessed it, me!  The screaming gaggle of teenagers that were waiting in the driveway for my child to arrive whisked her away as soon as she stepped out of the car.  The  young host of the party extricated her and escorted her inside to his parents and to put down her waterfight gear.  I’d already touched base with the parental units on food, etc.   These parents also have children with food allergies and intolerances to wheat and dairy which we’d discussed in the previous years as our children grew up together.

So why did I feel panicky and feel the tears well up as I drove away?  Despite all of my best efforts to keep fears at bay, there are just times that I think an allergic parent feels the enormity of the hand we’ve been dealt more keenly than others.  I try not to dwell on it too often otherwise we would put our child in a bubble and she’d have no life at all.  My husband and I are cautious to mitigate the risks but sometimes we do have to realize that those risks can’t be completely controlled by anyone, no matter how careful we are.  That’s true for sending our kids out into the world whether they have allergies or not.

I just don’t ever want to feel like I should have done more.